Bitch, Rant, Complain...

[SIPNGAS]

I didn't want to but I am so hating my soon-to-be ex right now. He's poised to take EVERYTHING that *I've* worked so hard for. And when I say everything, I mean the entire house full of furniture. He was living at home with Mom and Dad when we got married...moved in with nothing but his computer and a dresser and now he wants the entire living room, the bedroom, and the kitchen set and MY computer. He's not working and wants ME to pay ALL his bills and looks as though he's going to get his way. I am SO FED UP I am just ready to hand it all over and be done. I am seriously at the end of my rope and can't take much more.

Sorry, didn't mean to vent but nobody here wants to listen. You guys can choose to read or not. I'm usually pretty good at holding myself together but I can't do this.

[33OH]

Originally Posted by SIPNGAS

I didn't want to but I am so hating my soon-to-be ex right now. He's poised to take EVERYTHING that *I've* worked so hard for. And when I say everything, I mean the entire house full of furniture. He was living at home with Mom and Dad when we got married...moved in with nothing but his computer and a dresser and now he wants the entire living room, the bedroom, and the kitchen set and MY computer. He's not working and wants ME to pay ALL his bills and looks as though he's going to get his way. I am SO FED UP I am just ready to hand it all over and be done. I am seriously at the end of my rope and can't take much more.

Sorry, didn't mean to vent but nobody here wants to listen. You guys can choose to read or not. I'm usually pretty good at holding myself together but I can't do this.

Sorry to hear it Lisa.

[JBougie]

Originally Posted by SIPNGAS

I didn't want to but I am so hating my soon-to-be ex right now. He's poised to take EVERYTHING that *I've* worked so hard for. And when I say everything, I mean the entire house full of furniture. He was living at home with Mom and Dad when we got married...moved in with nothing but his computer and a dresser and now he wants the entire living room, the bedroom, and the kitchen set and MY computer. He's not working and wants ME to pay ALL his bills and looks as though he's going to get his way. I am SO FED UP I am just ready to hand it all over and be done. I am seriously at the end of my rope and can't take much more.

Sorry, didn't mean to vent but nobody here wants to listen. You guys can choose to read or not. I'm usually pretty good at holding myself together but I can't do this.

That is such BS. That's horrible, they should have it a set rule when it comes to divorce - "You leave with what you came with, and anything YOU bought while you were together" so that deadbeat spouses can't take 1/2 of stuff (or all of..) they didn't work for in the first damn place.

I'm sorry you're going through that :( That is really, really lame. I hope you come out on top in that situation!

[SIPNGAS]

Originally Posted by JBougie

That is such BS. That's horrible, they should have it a set rule when it comes to divorce - "You leave with what you came with, and anything YOU bought while you were together" so that deadbeat spouses can't take 1/2 of stuff (or all of..) they didn't work for in the first damn place.

I'm sorry you're going through that :( That is really, really lame. I hope you come out on top in that situation!

I don't think I will and I'm so tired of fighting. I had everything when he moved in...some things we upgraded but I offered to pay half (even though even most of the new things I purchased anyway).

he just wants it all and at this point, i can't stomach trying to fight.

[KCALB SIRAY]

Originally Posted by SIPNGAS

I don't think I will and I'm so tired of fighting. I had everything when he moved in...some things we upgraded but I offered to pay half (even though even most of the new things I purchased anyway).

he just wants it all and at this point, i can't stomach trying to fight.

Hold your ground!!

[yaris-me]

Originally Posted by SIPNGAS

I don't think I will and I'm so tired of fighting. I had everything when he moved in...some things we upgraded but I offered to pay half (even though even most of the new things I purchased anyway).

he just wants it all and at this point, i can't stomach trying to fight.

You need to stop listening to strangers and get a good lawyer. They are around, you just have to ask. Asking a corporate lawyer can get you leads on who is good at divorce. Judges have seen everything so they tend to be fair.

Moving forward is everything.

[SIPNGAS]

Originally Posted by yaris-me

You need to stop listening to strangers and get a good lawyer. They are around, you just have to ask. Asking a corporate lawyer can get you leads on who is good at divorce. Judges have seen everything so they tend to be fair.

Moving forward is everything.

I have contacted a lawyer but I can't afford the 2,000 dollar retainer most of the require.

What the ex isn't taking into account is during our marriage, I paid for ALL household expenses...rent, utilities, phone, cable, half the food..I pay for my car, etc....he's just a jerk.

[KCALB SIRAY]

Originally Posted by JBougie

That is such BS. That's horrible, they should have it a set rule when it comes to divorce - "You leave with what you came with, and anything YOU bought while you were together" so that deadbeat spouses can't take 1/2 of stuff (or all of..) they didn't work for in the first damn place.

I'm sorry you're going through that :( That is really, really lame. I hope you come out on top in that situation!

That's the law in Virginia. Anything had prior to being married does not fator in the dissolution of a marriage and cannot be added to the pot

[33OH]

Originally Posted by KCALB SIRAY

That's the law in Virginia. Anything had prior to being married does not fator in the dissolution of a marriage and cannot be added to the pot

Same in Ohio.

[JBougie]

Originally Posted by KCALB SIRAY

That's the law in Virginia. Anything had prior to being married does not fator in the dissolution of a marriage and cannot be added to the pot

That's cool! That's how it always should be, I hate people who feel they are entitled to things just because their significant other worked their ass off to get it. It makes me sick.

SIPNGAS, you can always set up a mock break in and make everything "disappear" LOL

just kidding :)

[hatchbackkid82]

Wow what a stand up guy I hope everything works out for you. You said it everything you worked for. I see it like this; if you came in with nothing you leave with nothing. He doesn't deserve anything from you. He is just being a parasite and feeding off of you, what a lowlife. Sorry to hear you're going through all that, fight for it, it's all yours. Hopefully he walks away with nothing. Keep your head up

Originally Posted by SIPNGAS

I didn't want to but I am so hating my soon-to-be ex right now. He's poised to take EVERYTHING that *I've* worked so hard for. And when I say everything, I mean the entire house full of furniture. He was living at home with Mom and Dad when we got married...moved in with nothing but his computer and a dresser and now he wants the entire living room, the bedroom, and the kitchen set and MY computer. He's not working and wants ME to pay ALL his bills and looks as though he's going to get his way. I am SO FED UP I am just ready to hand it all over and be done. I am seriously at the end of my rope and can't take much more.

Sorry, didn't mean to vent but nobody here wants to listen. You guys can choose to read or not. I'm usually pretty good at holding myself together but I can't do this.

[firemachine69]

Originally Posted by SIPNGAS

I didn't want to but I am so hating my soon-to-be ex right now. He's poised to take EVERYTHING that *I've* worked so hard for. And when I say everything, I mean the entire house full of furniture. He was living at home with Mom and Dad when we got married...moved in with nothing but his computer and a dresser and now he wants the entire living room, the bedroom, and the kitchen set and MY computer. He's not working and wants ME to pay ALL his bills and looks as though he's going to get his way. I am SO FED UP I am just ready to hand it all over and be done. I am seriously at the end of my rope and can't take much more.

Sorry, didn't mean to vent but nobody here wants to listen. You guys can choose to read or not. I'm usually pretty good at holding myself together but I can't do this.

I like to listen.

[SilverBack]

I'm sorry to hear that, Lisa. A man with no backbone deserves nothing but misery. I'm sure he'll get his...

Originally Posted by firemachine69

I like to listen.

Easy there buddy. She can't run away with you just yet

[GeneW]

Originally Posted by SIPNGAS

I didn't want to but I am so hating my soon-to-be ex right now. He's poised to take EVERYTHING that *I've* worked so hard for. And when I say everything, I mean the entire house full of furniture. He was living at home with Mom and Dad when we got married...moved in with nothing but his computer and a dresser and now he wants the entire living room, the bedroom, and the kitchen set and MY computer. He's not working and wants ME to pay ALL his bills and looks as though he's going to get his way. I am SO FED UP I am just ready to hand it all over and be done. I am seriously at the end of my rope and can't take much more.

Sorry, didn't mean to vent but nobody here wants to listen. You guys can choose to read or not. I'm usually pretty good at holding myself together but I can't do this.

Don't mean to be skeptical but you got more fight left in you. You gotta do it for yourself. If you don't stand up for yourself now years from now you'll regret it. Take it from me - nothing fuels regret like failing to stand up for yourself at the right moment.

It's not like you have to resolve it "here and now". You need to talk to your lawyer and see if you really owe him anything. This is a marathon and not a sprint, so pace yourself, take it easy and think things out carefully.

I take it that you have a lawyer? If not, why not? Why does he have all of the marbles? What is so special about this clown?

You're working and he isn't working? You got the power in this situation. You're the one with the steady income. You're the one who can pay a lawyer to stall him, make him wait and sweat, until his lack of money makes him take a better deal.

Dirty? Is it dirty to do what he did to you? Why do you owe him consideration at this point in time? Isn't he just giving you a last kick in the pants before he splits with you? Why give the creep the satisfaction?


If the "man" had any self respect he wouldn't ask for everything, he'd be fair minded about it. He'd get himself a temp job at the very least, not demand that his soon to be former spouse support him and give him the furniture.

The furniture!! What's he gonna do with furniture? Buy another house and make your pay for it? Rent a place and make your pay for it? Sell it off maybe?

If your lawyer ain't doing their job sack them. Get a second opinion - a lot of attorneys will give a free consult for the first half an hour. See what your legal options are in the state where you reside. You'd be surprised what you can negotiate if you're ready to walk away from the table.

Remember, Lisa, this is a marathon, not a sprint. Don't dash and don't expect to settle this any time soon. Be ready to stall, maneuver and move about until his lack of income wears him down.

Otherwise, you can take the easy way out, a way that isn't so easy in the long term, years from now, when you tell yourself, "I could have hacked it" and "I should have made him earn a living".

The economy? I still get phone calls for Contractor work, years after I quit looking. I get a mailing from Monster.com three times a week. There is work out here, it's not the greatest work, the hours aren't the best nor the pay, but it's enough to live on.

He has no excuses.... and if he has "problems" why are they your problems? Did you ruin his life? Did you hurt him? What do you owe him? He's the one who wasn't faithful, right? He's the one who stabbed you in the back, right? Why does he deserve a last insult after all of the injury?

Get your self respect back. Don't give him the satisfaction. Make up your mind to fight for what's yours and then go for it.

Gene